Discipline Is Not A Dirty Word!

During a recent visit to the mall, my wife and I observed an alarming pattern while we were attempting to enjoy our Chinese meal:: Children allowed to run around, with little to no supervision, and, basically, do whatever they want to do. We found ourselves getting rather annoyed. Not with the kids, but with the adults. We saw example after example of parents attempting, albeit extremely weakly, to rein in their rabble-rouser(s) with what were, obviously, idle threats.

"THIS IS NOT A PLAYGROUND! STOP PLAYING TAG IN BETWEEN PEOPLES' TABLES!!"

"GET OUT FROM UNDER THAT TABLE! YOU'RE BEING A NUISANCE! OH, WHEN WE GET HOME, YOU'RE GOING TO GET IT!!"

"WHY WOULD YOU DUMP YOUR DRINK ALL OVER THE FLOOR?!?! IF WE DIDN'T HAVE TO GET GOING, I'D MAKE YOU CLEAN IT UP YOURSELF!!"

We walked away that day asking, "Where has the discipline gone?"

I heard a sermon some time ago that dealt with the issue of "spare the rod, spoil the child." Proverbs 13:24 says, "Whoever spares the rod hates their children, but the one who loves their children is careful to discipline them." What I loved about this particular sermon was the Pastor's contextual perspective of the Scripture. Think of the "rod" not as a switch to beat with but as a shepherd's staff. A good shepherd would never beat his sheep but he would use the staff (rod) to guide them where he wanted them to go. I thought it was a beautiful illustration and one we used on our daughter as she was growing up (and, quite honestly, even now as a 20 year-old college Junior). While there were no spankings in our home, there was a lot of "guiding" and she grew up with a complete understanding and correlation between her actions and the consequences of those actions. I am saying (and I think she would concur), there was a lot of discipline in our home.

It is my firm belief that "discipline begets discipline." By that I mean, if more parents were to raise their children with a full understanding and consistent application of discipline, the children of those parents would then be better equipped to succeed in life. They will know that their actions today affect their lives tomorrow. We seem to be lacking that today.

In Malcolm Gladwell's brilliant book, "Outliers," he highlights the "10,000-Hour Rule." A couple of examples he gives are Bill Gates and The Beatles; individuals who achieve meteoric success only through consistent, disciplined effort (10,000 hours worth). Parents who teach their children discipline are increasing the likelihood of them succeeding exponentially. There is no magic formula, no 5 easy steps to success in life. You can't just show up for work and expect a promotion in 3 months. Discipline takes time and effort but it's rewards are worth it!

Disciplined people take a long-term view of life. The followers of Jesus were called Disciples (Disciplined Ones). There is tremendous payoff to this approach. Today, take a look at the various areas of your life. See if there aren't some places where more discipline may be of benefit. You may be very disciplined at work and get the job done but what about physically? Do you consistently hit the gym or the road in order to be the best you you can be? Are you a super-achiever but maybe lack the discipline to every so often say, "no," to a request of your time so you can read, study, or just be alone with your thoughts? Are you a loyal, faithful follower of your favorite sports team but there never seems to be enough time in the day to do things with your family?

Discipline is not a dirty word! It's an asset we all possess. It's just a matter of application. And if you're a parent with small children, try applying some consistent, loving discipline to them and watch the positive impacts it has. Those of us trying to enjoy our Chinese lunch at the mall will thank you!

And He said to them, Come after Me [as disciples---letting Me be your Guide], follow Me, and I will make you fishers of men! - Matthew 4:19 (AMP)

What's In Your Future?

Syria, terrorism, government shutdown, mass shootings, massive debt, and on and on.... There's so much negativity in the news today that makes one wonder what the future holds. If you're not careful, it can even create worry and anxiety. It's really easy to get caught up in the "macro" events occurring and lose focus on the "micro" choices we make that actually have the greatest impact.

Last November, in the fourth quarter of the sales year, I was in California on a business/personal trip. I was waiting for final confirmation from my number 1 prospect that they were ready to sign the contract. This would be the deal that put me over my quota and guarantee a trip to the Virgin Islands. When I got the text message it was not what was expected. In the 11th hour, the "powers that be" decided not to move forward with my company but, instead, go with the incumbent vendor. I looked at my wife and said, "Oh no!" It looked like the year was over and I would not make my number. I gave myself 30 seconds to mourn the loss. Too often, we spend too much time wallowing in self-pity and asking questions like, "Why did this happen to me? Why now?" At that moment, I knew I had a choice to make and I chose to focus on doing what I had to to bring in the business needed to get me to my number. On December 28th, I was able to secure a contract that put me over my number and was actually larger than the deal lost on November 7th. I learned that by focusing on what I could control and not on what had happened or the circumstances as they appeared on that November morning, I was able to accomplish my goal.

What is your attitude toward your future? Do you think things are out of control and headed in a downward spiral? Are there so many uncertainties in your life that they keep you up at night? Mortgages, relationships, career/job security (or lack thereof) all can contribute to an uneasiness about tomorrow.

I heard Zig Ziglar ask his audience a question a few years ago, "Are there things you could do today, tomorrow, and over the next two weeks that could negatively affect your life?" Then he asked a follow up question, "Are there things you could do today, tomorrow, and over the next two weeks that could positively affect your life?" The point is, we are in much more control of our future than we sometimes realize.

Your future should be giving you hope, not helplessness. It should be bright, not burdensome. Because of the choices you make today, your future is incredible!! I like what Tim Tebow said when asked about his future:

“I don't know what my future holds, but I do know who holds my future.”

Today, know that you and your choices are what will ultimately affect your future.

If your facing challenges or difficult times, choose the response that is going to be the most effective in mitigating the negative and positioning the positive outcome.

If you're in a great place right now and feel that your future is bright, seek out people you can help and provide encouragement to. You and your positive outlook could be the difference in someone's future.

Finally, realize the power and control you have over your future. Don't give that away. Use it to your advantage and watch the incredible life you deserve unfold before your eyes!

"I call heaven and earth as witnesses today against you, that I have set before you life and death, blessing and cursing; therefore choose life, that both you and your descendants may live;" - Deuteronomy 30:19 (NKJV)

What Do You Expect?

A lot has been written recently about happiness and optimism. As an optimist, I find this interesting. Having just finished Shawn Achor's book, "The Happiness Advantage," I was happy (no pun intended) to see all the scientific evidence supporting the belief that having a positive outlook on life actually impacts overall success.

Merriam-Webster defines optimism this way:

op·ti·mism noun \ˈäp-tə-ˌmi-zəm\ - an inclination to put the most favorable construction upon actions and events or to anticipate the best possible outcome

On a webinar last week with Shawn Achor, I heard him define optimism this way: The belief that your behavior matters. 

Whether you are naturally optimistic or not, one area of your life you can control and change immediately, is your attitude of expectation. One of my core beliefs that I have experienced and observed in life is this:

Your level of success in anything you do will rise to the level of your expectation 

Because of this, I have to ask, "What do you expect?" When going on that interview, what do you expect? Applying for that mortgage, what do you expect? Being considered for that promotion, what do you expect? Walking into that college exam, what do you expect?

As you analyze and evaluate your "self-talk" during times of an uncertain outcome, see what words you're using and what your expectation is. As you consciously choose to believe for positive outcomes based upon your attitude of expectation, your life will immediately begin to change.

I first heard the term "inverse paranoid" when listening to an old Earl Nightingale personal development recording. I came across it again when reading Jack Canfield's "The Success Principles" (Become an Inverse Paranoid is Success Principle #6). The definition of an inverse paranoid is, "Today the world is plotting to do me good. I can’t wait to see what’s next!” By adopting an attitude of expectation like that, good things will begin to happen.

My expectation level dramatically increased once I learned just how interested God was in my success. I used to think you only went to Him when you were in trouble or needed something that looked impossible. Once I got a revelation that His Grace is Unmerited Favor and that His plans for me are good, I began to expect good things all the time. This expectation allows me to see good things even in bad or difficult times. Just as John C. Maxwell's new book suggests, "Sometimes You Win, Sometimes You Learn."

Go out to today with a heightened expectation level in everything you do. Become an Inverse Paranoid expecting everything to be working for your good. And, finally, know that God's plans for you are good and look for the positive, the lessons, and the upside in every situation you face.

"'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'" - Jeremiah 29:11

Excellence Will Excel You!

"So, Craig, what do you do for a living?"

With that single question, asked a number of years ago, I was given the opportunity to share my philosophy with a new acquaintance.

"Well, I guess I'd have to say, I do as little as possible for as much as possible."

While somewhat humorous, it was not far from the truth and my reality at the time. What was really funny was her response.

"Oh, I'm in sales too!"

As I think back to that discussion almost a decade ago, I have to shake my head. I wasn't raised that way and I certainly didn't work like that...all the time. I had "glimpses of greatness" where I would shine but then, almost subconsciously, I would put it in neutral and coast for awhile. Then, when I would need to, I'd put my foot on the accelerator and do well again. This constant accelerate, coast, accelerate, coast activity had ingrained itself in me up to the day I had that interaction with my new acquaintance.

When I thought about my mindset a few days later, I became increasingly disgusted by it. Soon after that, I heard a pastor preach on having a "Spirit of Excellence" and everything changed. I found mentors who lived and taught on excellence, I read books on living an excellent life (if you don't have one, the Bible is an excellent place to start), and I began practicing excellence in everything I did.

Five years ago, I heard a presenter at a Toastmaster's event ask the audience a question. "What do you think the number one thing is that keeps people from achieving their dreams?" He got the expected answers of fear, procrastination, doubt, etc. He said those are all good answers but wrong. The number one thing that keeps people from achieving their dreams is "being good enough." Then he asked THE question. "Are you too good to be great?" Hmm...

Vince Lombardi, arguably the greatest coach and motivator of all time, said:

"The quality of a person's life is in direct proportion to their commitment to excellence, regardless of their chosen field of endeavor."

For the last ten years, my Wife and I have chosen an attitude of excellence in every area of our lives and we hold each other accountable to it. It has paid off. One recent illustration of that: We've been in a rental house for two years as we've been deciding whether to buy or build a home. We decided to build. However, the way the timing would work out, we were going to have renew our lease for less than the full year and put the landlord in a tough spot. They'd be trying to rent the house out in January (not the best time to find new renters). After considering our request, the landlord called and said, "I know this doesn't make sense for us, Craig, but we'll agree to the partial year lease extension. You and Wendy have taken such good care of the house and yard, we want to pay it forward." Our attitude of excellence toward our rental house saved us the time, money, and aggravation of a double move before our new home was built.

This week, commit yourself to not settling for "good enough" and strive for excellence in all you do. Become known as the person who goes above and beyond to do it the best. If you'll commit yourself to choosing an attitude of excellence, you will find that excellence really will excel you!

"His master said to him, Well done, you upright (honorable, admirable) and faithful servant! You have been faithful and trustworthy over a little; I will put you in charge of much. Enter into and share the joy (the delight, the blessedness) which your master enjoys." - Matthew 25:21 (AMP)

"And whatever you do, do it heartily, as to the Lord and not to men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the reward of the inheritance; for you serve the Lord Christ." - Colossians 3:23&24 (NKJV)

Labor Day, 2013

I've been working the vast majority of my life. Growing up on a farm in northern Minnesota taught me a lot of things and one of the most valuable lessons was developing a strong work ethic.

There were early mornings of feeding and milking cows with my Dad and Uncle on the family farm before school. The long summer days of picking rocks, baling hay, combining, and plowing were just a few of the activities my parents used to teach me about the pride that comes with a hard days' work. I've worked as a janitor, retail associate, lawn mower, trainer, and even an interviewer at the county jail for personal recognizance bonds (stories from those days are for another blog). After college, I've had the pleasure of working for companies that range from start-ups to the Fortune 500. The one thing that has paid dividends throughout my career is the willingness to work hard at whatever I was doing.

The last few years have been difficult for America. We've seen unemployment remain high and new job creation stubbornly low. If you read the newspaper or watch the news on TV, you can get pretty depressed pretty quickly.

I know what it feels like to face bills that are due when there is no income. When my Wife and I were first starting our lives together and our daughter was one year-old, I lost my job. It could have been devastating. And when the recession hit the company I was working for in 2008, I was caught up in a "reduction-in-force" a week before Christmas.

It's in challenging times like these that your core beliefs are tested. Remembering promises like that found in Jeremiah 29:11, "'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future'" help keep things in proper perspective. Through difficult and good times, there are some things that remain constant:

America is still the land of opportunity. God has blessed this nation and dreams still come true here. Even if circumstances look bleak, know better times are coming. You are only limited by your own thinking. Let your creativity soar and see where it takes you. The answer to your situation may be way outside conventional thinking.

Never underestimate your network. The old adage, "It's not what you know but who you know" is alive and well. Today, we have the benefit of social networking sites like Linkedin and Facebook to assist us in our efforts. And remember your network is made stronger by giving and taking. Sometimes you may need what your network offers. Other times, your network will need what you have to offer. Never hesitate to help others.

Finally, never lose Faith! There is a reason you're going through what you are. Look for the lessons to be learned and let the growth begin. Never compromise your character and integrity, no matter how tempting that may be. In extremely challenging times, God allowed me to learn more about myself and what I'm capable of much more than when times are good.

Happy Labor Day! Be thankful for the opportunities we have as citizens of this great nation, continue building your network and help others that may need your assistance, and never lose Faith that your best days are ahead of you!

"You will eat the fruit of your labor; blessings and prosperity will be yours." Psalm 128:2

  "For even when we were with you, we gave you this rule: 'The one who is unwilling to work shall not eat.'” - 2 Thessalonians 3:10